How to Guarantee Effective Castration

Okay, so you're looking to get your balls cutoff. You've been with someone for 2 years and it's pretty serious, you moved with her across the country and she's definately a keeper. When the topic of engagement comes up do you:

a. Go out and buy a ring and do the right thing
b. Move out
c. Talk it out and discuss your feelings and love for each other
d. Tell her you are not ready
e. Look online for Red Sox tickets

Apparently in this example, both d and e would be correct answers.

Guys, I know we can all be stupid at times, some more than others, but there are a few simple facts that even guys can understand about dealing with women. If they've given you the commitment and have supported you and care for you enough to move you a few thousand miles with them, you need to get off your ass and go buy a fucking ring. Oh, and the Red Sox got clobbered this season, just to rub it in.